i love you dictionary

2006-06-02T12:09:00.000-07:00

Part of my morning was dedicated to perusing the interests of the finalists from last night's Scripps National Spelling Bee. Bless their hearts:

On Matthew "My hair defies logic" Giese: "His favorite subject is music, and he plays in a Renaissance and baroque recorder group at school."

On Number 1 Stunner Michael Christie: "He collects any unique rock he sees, whether on the road or at the beach." That's right, even at the beach!

On Homeschooler of the Year and Endearingly Delusional Jonathan Horton: "His favorite music is Christian rock. Jonathan enjoys sports and looks forward to watching Phoenix Suns and Arizona Diamondbacks games."

ABC gave us a truly mind-expanding clip of this last kid playing hoops. The poor dear plays worse than most if not all six-year-olds; he actually managed to shoot the ball entirely over the backboard after shooting it below the net in a grand display of overcompensation. He thinks he will probably be a professional basketball player, probably, not as good as Jordan but definitely on the level of Nash. I did enjoy the baggy white t-shirt, sleeves resting on elbows, tucked into faded black highwater sweatpants and heeeeeuge white tennies. Jonathan's spelling technique: rapid-fire blinking in sequence with epileptic-inspired 90-degree turns and speaking into his fist.

Play on, players.

the great eating adventure 2006: year of the pig

2006-05-31T09:50:00.000-07:00

Every year I like to convene certain foodies to discuss our dining accomplishments, hopes and fears. This year, in a new format, I will address the following categories: "Food Bargains," Ellen's Favorites," and "Ellen's Current Food List.” Bear in mind while reading that my ideal meal, which is in fact rather difficult to find, involves excellent food and a bottle of wine at a small, well-designed restaurant for no more than $40.

FOOD BARGAINS:

Words cannot express my love for the burritos at Taqueria y Fonda (968 Amsterdam btw. 107th and 108th). These burritos are filled with better cheese, better vegetables, better meat and better beans than any burrito I have ever consumed. Add to this the massive size and weight of the burrito (two people can share and be satisfied) and the variety of cheap mexican beer. A little bit of heaven in the form of one (1) gastric monstrosity.

Whether I am sick or not, I think the best noodles in New York may be found at Rai Rai Ken (214 E. 10th btw. 1st and 2nd). Also, Momofuku (1st Ave. btw. 10th and 11th) has soft and tender Berkshire pork buns and Hitachino White beer to complement their slightly upscale noodles, and I hear the chef has expanded his empire to include a Japanese burrito joint in the West Village. Believe the hype.

No meal at Momofuku would be complete without dessert at Chikalicious (E. 10th btw. 1st and 2nd), where chef Chika creates a daily menu of unique and typically light desserts paired with wine, most notably among them the fromage blanc cheesecake, served chilled atop a pile of ice shavings.

The grilled corn at Cafe Habana (17 Prince at Elizabeth) is the perfect afternoon shopping snack. Add one of their margaritas to the mix if you like getting drunk.

For a quick shot of grease, head to Tuck Shop: The Great Aussie Bite (1st St. btw. 1st and 2nd) for their sausage rolls with sage and carrots or the chicken pot pie with leeks. Perfect unless of course you need to be relatively mobile after consumption.

Best Gelato/Sorbet: NYC ICY (21 Ave. B btw. 2nd and 3rd). Sadly, I think they have closed, though the awning remains in tact.

Best German Dining Experience, formerly awarded to Zum Schneider, has passed to Jimmy’s (43 E. 7th btw. 2nd and 3rd), conveniently located in the middle of the East Village and yet miraculously untouched by the weekend yuppie invasion. At Jimmy’s, they believe in and perfectly execute the healing power of cured meats and beer. However, if you prefer to enjoy your bratwurst with a side of professional sports, Loreley (Rivington btw. Bowery and Chrystie) is more than a satisfactory alternative.

Best Oysters: A tie between Jack's Luxury Oyster Bar (5th btw. 2nd and 3rd) and Pearl Oyster Bar (Cornelia St. btw. Bleecker and W. 4th), the former being preferable in terms of fine dining and cooked oysters (the oysters Rockefeller is a house specialty) and the latter if you are looking for quality comfort food such as lobster rolls and blueberry pie.

ELLEN'S FAVORITES:

My lasting obsession in the food bargains department (and really all-around) is Westville (W. 10th and Bleecker). I have been dining here for over two years and have yet to be disappointed. It's American with a healthy twist that can be compromised in numerous ways, one of those ways being their incredible macaroni and cheese with smoked bacon. They have everything from Nathan's hot dogs to crab cakes to whole grilled fish (the trout is ridiculous) to braised lamb shanks and beyond, all surprisingly light. Additionally, they feature vegetable platters designed around the daily offerings at Union Square Market. The wine list is reasonably priced and has not yet failed me, and the dessert chef, a pleasantly rotund young Swedish lass, makes homemade oreos that blow my mind. I always get two and save one for later-- about one hour later.

On the pricier and Scandanavian side of life, I truly love Aquavit (424 Madison). I recommend the smoked salmon appetizer, which tastes nothing like lox and is almost sweet, and which is nicely balanced with creme fraiche and a little caviar. May I have your attention please: YOU MUST EAT THE ARCTIC CIRCLE. I don't know how to describe it beyond the best dessert I have ever had and you know I love dessert so just shut up already and eat it.

The Spotted Pig (W.11th at Greenwich) rounds out this year’s obsession with gastro-pubs and is at the top of the heap. The goat-cheese gnudi with sage was the best pasta dish I’ve had all year and the pork belly was perfectly crunchy, which was key when confronted with all that fat.

In the EV/LES, my first choice is WD-50 (Clinton btw. Stanton and Rivington), where wily Wylie (sorry, I had to) creates dishes that are entirely unique (corn gelato with coffee crumble, for example) while beautifully executing more traditional dishes (the flat iron steak was phenomenally rare and buttery). Still, shout out to The Tasting Room (1st St. btw. 1st and 2nd), for satisfying my desire for small plates and small birds.

Best Tapas: Casa Mono (52 Irving Pl. at 17th), the site of my 26th birthday dinner and perfect for such an occasion, especially if one loves wild game as I do. Highlights included pumpkin and goat cheese croquettes, razor clams and perfectly seared venison.

Best Cheese: Artisanal (Park Ave. at 32nd). I don’t know even know where to begin between the fondue and the in-restaurant cheese shop for sampling. (Still, my heart belongs to the man selling the aged goat cheese at the Greenmarket.)

Best Sushi: Jewel Bako (7th St. btw. 2nd and 3rd), though it should be noted that sushi took a backburner to fat this year. The restaurant’s stunning wooden arch design feels like the interior of an immaculately clean boat, and the tasting menu always offers something new, though by the time I’m halfway through I’ve forgotten what everything is. Thankfully the waitstaff is patient.

I had another favorite that I have forgotten but that does not mean it is not also very good.

ELLEN'S CURRENT FOOD LIST: (places to go, food to eat)

Del Posto
Bellavitae
BLT Fish
Wallsé
Perry Street
Tía Pol
Al Di Là
Barbossa
Aki
Employees Only
Union Square Cafe
Per Se
Blue Goose
Mercadito

SIDE NOTES:

Also I enjoy eating skate at Blue Ribbon Brasserie (Sullivan btw. Prince and Spring) at 2:00 a.m., while my partner-in-crime Gina devours skirt steak.

Weirdest meal consumed in 2005: Baekeoffe at The Bar Room at The Modern (11 West 53rd btw. 5th and 6th), which consisted of lamb, conch and tripe served piping hot in a clay dish that, while initially appearing much like lasagna, had the most unappetizing combination of textures to cross these lips in some time. Kind of like eating an accordion made of chewy octopus in conjunction with a rancid veggie burger, covered in tomato sauce. Live and learn.

xxx

2006-05-22T07:42:00.000-07:00

Dear New York Times,

Thank you for your multimedia presentations. They are both captivating and informative.

Kisses,

Ellen

slender retort

i love you dictionary

the great eating adventure 2006: year of the pig

xxx